frustration

i don’t want to fall asleep. 

i don’t like sleeping when i’m angry, or frustrated, it usually doesn’t resolve itself in the morning. i don’t like waking up angry or frustrated in the morning.

just had a bit of a fight with the boy. kinda. i know he was just trying to be helpful, but everything he said i feel like i’ve tried. i was feeling defensive and lost because the advice he was giving me worked for him, but it wasn’t necessarily working for me. i don’t get it. it’s frustrating.

making a film is frustrating. when i feel like it shouldn’t be. every time i think about this, the more i don’t want to make a film

mainly because it feels like i’m forcing it.

i don’t know how to relax.

for fuck’s sake.

i don’t even know what’s going on. all this emotional irrationality.

i’m also tired of trying to think things through, mainly because it’s frustrating feeling lost. 

i don’t want to sleep.

but maybe i’ll just do it. >:|

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